A Good Ol’ Raging Christmas Rant (and ideas for presents)

by Josh


It is cold outside. Daylight is scarce and feeble. Sleep seems like a good idea a lot of the time.
Or consumption. And everywhere I go, the media is trying to convince me, that oblivion is just a couple of Euros away.
You know the story.
You invest your time, your life in other words, to earn money.
And they want it.

Persuasive communication is rather ineffective, when it comes to selling us stuff we don’t actually want.
But they try and make us want stuff.
And we want stuff.

Following in the wake of my friend Martin (buys nothing new in 2013), I would like to request you, to spend the coin of your life (which is time) wisely.
Christmas (Hannukka, Bayram, whatever) is NOT about presents.
It is NOT about showing your appreciation by spending money on others.
We all know that affection can’t be bought. Don’t be fooled to think otherwise.

It is about getting a huddle (or cuddle) with your family and those you care about.
It is about eating nice food, sharing a good laugh and a warm stove.
It is about connecting to our nature as herd animals.

Tell your family members how much you love and appreciate them. How about a letters, bursting with appreciation?
Praise them for all the things they’ve done for you (gee, all those diapers, thanks Mama!).
Tell them what they mean to you, what difference they made in your life and what you think they are great at.
It’s among the greatest things you can do for a person.
To show people your sincere appreciation means to give them flowers while they can still smell them.
Heck, it makes a huge difference!

It’s worth ten times all of the stuff in these retarded “present stores” filled with peeing porcelain cats and candles that look like penises (ha ha ha).

Forgive someone. Ask someone for forgiveness.
This year, give time, generous listening and outrageous acknowledgement for presents.
Make ridiculous hand-crafted jewelry.
If you want to spend money, use your funds to buy delicious, organic foods or donate to charity.
Don’t create a circle of guilt, buying something because you think you’ll feel guilty if you buy nothing. Chances are it will serve as clutter, a dusty item, not to be thrown away for years out of the same perceived guilt.

(Excuse my words)
Fuck those corporate wankers that try to tell you that you are one if you don’t buy stuff.
Fuck them if they want to make you believe, that how you express your love is insufficient.
I love you.
Merry Christmas.