Zeus vs. Jesus – Failure and How I deal with it.

by Josh


Sometimes you win, and sometimes you learn – unknown

As you know, my new years resolutions were to omit porn and warm showers in 2013.
I’ve failed both.
I could bore you now with the hows and whats but thats of no value to you.

The longer I’ve been waiting to do something about it (~2 weeks), the more I could see this growing back into a full blown habit.
One of the things I love about blogging, is that it gives me a very strong motivation to walk my talk.
As a blogger, I see it as my duty towards my readers to practice what I preach.
So yeah.
One could say that I’ve failed my new years resolution, not to watch any porn in 2013.
I could just surrender and live my life as a happy wanker.
Thanks a lot, but no thanks.
The indirect costs are just way too high.
As from now on, I will eat one spoonfull of catfood for every time that I watch porn.

Warm Showers
Secondly, I am back to taking warm showers.
After 63 days of only cold showers, I caught a cold and took some warm showers.
I noticed, that cold showers just don’t really get me clean.
Especially washing hair is no fun with cold water.
It’s a bit lame, but now I clean myself quickly with warm water first and then take a cold shower for 3-5min.

Apart from the fact that I am not fond of supersticious belief in general, I do have a specific problem with Christian religion.
It seems to impose a certain sense of shame on us for what are mostly very basic biological desires.
When little baby Jesus was born, his mother was apparently still a virgin (which is most definitely a translation blunder).
I can only imagine how jealous poor old Joseph must have been:
“What does HE have that I don’t???”
Anyway this religion is based on a near perfect human being.
Like: “This is how you should be, and if you are not, shame on you!”

This is why I greatly prefer greek mythology and it’s cool stories.
The greek gods were basically everyday human beings, but with superpowers.
They were lustful, greedy, treacherous and jealous. They cheated and murdered and had loads of personal weaknesses.
The richness of the storys in greek mythology is amazing and full of ancient wisdom.
But most importantly, it is not disconnected from human nature.

“In theory, we are all gods” I once read somewhere.
So often, we feel guilty because we have these ridiculously high standards for ourselves.
If we fail, we just account it to our personal weakness, we beat oureselves up for it and abandon the goal, to evade future shame.
It is so easy to overlook, that there is nothing wrong with you.
You are perfect.
It is just your behaviour that might not be effective for what you want to achieve. 

To fitness coaches and weight watchers, January is the equivalent of what December is for toy stores.
Hordes of people sign up, full of good intentions and hope.
They’ve been wanting to change for so long, and this is it, the moment has come.
Most of them relapse within one week, and two thirds have signed out again by february. (Numbers are from a Dutch study).
This is, because we beat ourselves up about failure.
We’ve all seen movies where great changes happen over night.
Within a couple of minutes, the geek turns into a freak.
We think we ought to be perfect in self discipline, but we are not, it is not in our nature.
Lets face it, quitting smoking would’ve been as hard for Jesus as for anyone else.

When making plans to transform our behavior, a healthy amount of self-understanding and patience is needed.
Patiene is a virtue, especially with yourself.
A new years resolution is the north of your compass, your decision on how you want to use this year.
How you want to be or act at the end of it.
It’s NOT an opportunity to take ridiculous decisions, hoping that just because it is a new year, you have become a different person over night, and if that didn’t happen just go back to whatever shitty behavior/circumstance you’ve allowed yourself to become accustomed to.
Have patience with yourself, but keep going. Baby steps. Don’t stress about who/what you are not (yet).
Being Happy is the way to success, not the other way round.